Teaching kids virtues in words they understand

Occasionally I work in the children's ministry at Northstar Church, and I love how they teach our children virtues in words they can understand. I took note of them so that I could reinforce those definitions at home and also share them with others.

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FORGIVENESS: Deciding that someone who has wronged you doesn't have to pay.

KINDNESS: Showing others they're valuable by how you treat them.

HUMILITY: Putting others first by giving up what you think you deserve.

COURAGE: Being brave enough to do what you should, even when you're afraid.

DETERMINATION: Deciding it's worth it to finish what you've started.

PEACE: Proving that you care more about others than winning an argument.

RESPECT: Showing others are important by what you say and do.

JOY: Finding a way to be happy even when things don't go your way.

INITIATIVE: Seeing what needs to be done and doing it.

HOPE: Believing that something good can come out of something bad.

UNIQUENESS: Learning more about others so you can know more about yourself.

Better than a gift card

My eleven year old wanted to give her friend "something cool" for her birthday, but also something that her friend could use. We know most kids like gift cards -- and let's face it -- today, kids are most pleased with cash. I was at that age!

But that seems so impersonal, and not the little bit creative.

So we decided to do something a little different. We converted $20 into silver dollars, both the old and new kind, and stuck them in a mini purse. Needless to say, it was a huge hit! :)

Wishing you LOVE and CANDY



Thank you, Pinterest, for once again, giving me a great DIY idea for the holidays. 

Rather than spend $5 on store-bought Barbie or Disney Valentine's Day cards, I took a picture of Nadia with my phone, did a little PhotoShop work to create a new background and add some text, and then uploaded my photo to Wal-Mart.

One hour later -- voila! A Valentine's card to give to her friends that only cost me 19 cents each to print. :)

Mmmmm. .. meat candy

Ever since my sister-in-law made this for a family reunion, I've been hooked, and it's been my go to for potlucks and party appetizers. It's easy to make, only requires three ingredients, and is always the first appetizer to disappear first.

1. Start with 'Lil Smokies and a package of center-cut bacon.

2. Slice each piece of bacon down the middle and wrap half of it around one of the lil smokies. Put it on a sprayed cookie sheet, seem side down. (I lined my sheet in parchment paper for easy cleanup.)

3. After you've done all the smokies, top with a generous portion of brown sugar. At least half a cup for a single batch. Note that a double batch is shown below (two packages of sausage and bacon). 

4. Bake at 350 degrees for about 45 minutes. Check half way through and turn them over so that the bottom doesn't stick and burn.

5. I could easily have named this meat crack. Enjoy!

NOTE: For a lighter version, you could also use sliced low-fat turkey smoked sausage. I've done this as well, secured with a toothpick. Equally tasty and less guilt. :)

Frozen Yogurt Pops

I've found a solution to the popscicles my kids are addicted to. Frozen yogurt pops!

Simply insert a spoon right through the peel-back cover, which helps it stand up during freezing. And then in the morning (or after school), peel off the label, run the container under warm water until it loosens, and pull the spoon out.

Love on a stick! :)

Focusing on the Three Rs of Child Rearing

In his book “A Family of Value,” John Rosemond gives a no-nonsense look at raising healthy and happy children. And in many ways it’s contrary to what society often teaches. But I’m on board with raising our kids the way “Grandma used to do it." Yes, I realize times have changed. But I feel wholeheartedly that as parents, we need to focus on instilling within our kids what Rosemond calls the “Three R’s” of child-rearing. I've copied from his book verbatim as he breaks each down, just in case you were thinking of the other three Rs. :)

RESPECT

The teaching of these values begins at home. Respect was developed first toward one’s parents, whose responsibility it was to command (not demand) it by being authoritative role models and directors of proper moral behavior. Having been successfully “rooted,” respect extended outward to include other authority figures – teachers, police, lawmakers, employers – then further still to include every honest, law=abiding person, regardless of background or station in life. Finally, this respect would come full circle back to the child, now perhaps in his or her late adolescence, as a relatively mature sense of self-respect. It is, after all, a scriptural truth that in order to achieve respect for self, one must first give respect away, not selectively, but universally. To “love thyself” you must first “love thy neighbor” and “love thy God.” In the final analysis, then self-respect is something earned, not something that can be either learned or given.

RESPONSIBILITY

Responsibility was learned through the doing of chores in and around the home. These acts were to be selfless; in other words, they were not compensated with money. The child was to do them because, and only because, he was a member of the family. As such, he shared in the family’s work as well as its bounty. Through the doing of chores, the child learned the value of contribution, a prime tenet of good citizenship. The child’s contributions to the family uplifted not only his own value within the family, but also the value of the family to him. This sharing, this mutuality of value, bonded the child to the values that defined the family, thus forming ‘A Family of Value.’

RESOURCEFULNESS

Resourcefulness – the ability to do a lot with relatively little – was neither earned nor learned, but rather brought forth. It is, after all, every child’s nature to be resourceful. It is not human nature to be respectful or responsible, but resourcefulness is a different matter. To bring forth the resourcefulness of a child, parents of not so long ago provided the child with everything he needed along with a small – very small, in most cases – amount of what he wanted. In short, they said “no” more often than they said “yes.” Thus, “creatively deprived,” the child had to learn to solve problems on his own. He had to do his own homework, occupy himself, solve his own social conflicts, and so on. He had to invent solutions to problems in these areas because adults, for the most part, would not solve those problems for him. Adults wanted the child to learn to “stand on his own two feet.” Therefore, they were quite conservative when it came to letting him stand on theirs.

These were the standards of good child rearing. Parents were not measured by the grades their children earned in school. Everyone knew that a child possessed of the “Three Rs” would do his or her best in school, and that was sufficient. . . Parents of generations past were measured against the standard of the “Three Rs.” If, as a parent during those times, you had succeeded in the eyes of your peers at endowing your children with adequate amounts of each “R” – and whether you had succeeded or not was self-evident – your child-rearing skills would be held in high esteem. Your friends and neighbors, therefore, would have said you “were doing a good job.” Whether your child grew up to become a doctor or a janitor was secondary to the fact that your good child rearing had all but guaranteed that whatever path he chose to walk, he would be an asset to the community.

Excerpt from Chapter 1, A Family of Value (1995), John Rosemond

Why a daughter needs a dad

A tribute to my husband, Tony, the greatest dad my girls could ever have.

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A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
so that she will have at least one hero who will not let her down.


A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to learn that when he says it will be okay soon, it will.



A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to teach her that her value as a person is more than the way she looks.


A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to teach her that ignorance is not an excuse for anything.
to teach her not to let pride get in the way of discovering things.
to teach her to experiment for the sake of testing her own assumptions.
to teach her how to focus her mind in the midst of distraction.

A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
so that when no one else is there for her, she can close her eyes and see him.

A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
who will not punish her for her mistakes, but will help her learn from them.
to teach her to believe that she deserves to be treated well.
to teach her to weigh the consequences of her actions and make decisions accordingly.


A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to be the standard against which she will judge all men.



A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to teach her that family is more important than work.


A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to be the safe spot she can always turn to.

A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
who will let her know that while she may not be the center of someone else’s world, she is the center of his.

A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to teach her that she is equal to her husband.

A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to help her take the risks that will build her confidence.

A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to carry her just because she wants to be carried.

A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
who teaches her she is important by stopping what he is doing to watch her.

A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to teach her the importance of being a lady.

A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to show her how to fix things for herself.

A DAUGHTER NEEDS A DAD
to tell her all she needs to know about boys.
to show her that all boys are not like the ones who hurt her.
to teach her how to recognize a gentleman.
to stand with her on the day she marries the man she hopes will be just like her father.
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Excerpts from "Why a daughter needs a dad" (Gregory E. Lang)